Want to surrender control completely? Submission takes on a whole new level when hypnosis comes into play. Blending all the essentials of hypnosis and hypnotherapy, erotic hypnosis takes this well-studied world and repurposes it for a raunchy old time. Psychologist Dr. Pam Spurr puts it best when she says that erotic hypnosis is so successful because hypnosis triggers “a state of highly focused attention alongside deep relaxation,” helping you become “more suggestible” and “take on board positive messaging.”
Messaging like having an orgasm.
While erotic hypnosis sounds like something ripped from the latest sci-fi erotica, in reality, it’s been enmeshed in the kink community since the late 1800s, when hypnosis itself first became popular. In those days, hypnosis roles fell along a gender binary and played into gender tropes, with male hypnotists turning women into submissive vessels for the delight of the crowd. Back then, erotic hypnosis was even popular enough to find its way into early porn in the 1930s stag film The Hypnotist.
But it’s 2021, baby, and times change. While erotic hypnosis is still a hot topic, nowadays, hypnosis history specialist Claire Voon says that more women are certified hypnotists than men. And as the internet has dominated the sex community, this kink has made its way to the limelight once again, with its own websites, YouTube channels, Reddit groups and FetLife Forums galore all taking the lead.
While every experience is different, many folks who explore erotic hypnosis talk about feeling a sort of dual experience: they know that, if they needed to, they could rouse themselves – but at the same time, there’s a total surrender that makes that hard to do. Instead of trying to fight the wave of submission and pleasure, subs under erotic hypnosis let that gooey warmth spread through their body.
That’s not to say that they lose their sense of self. While under erotic hypnosis, many people say they’re the most lucid they’ve ever been. Brian Moylan put it fantastically in an article for VICE, where he chronicled his strange and hot experience with erotic hypnosis:
“…it’s like my dick split open and released a million rays of sunshine all over my body… it was like an orgasm, but I was nowhere close to shooting… it just kept going and going and getting better and better and it felt so good and so foreign that I never knew if it was going to end… Strangely, it was almost non-sexual… this wasn’t about getting off, it was just about an unbridled pleasure that felt like it would either drive me mad or split my brain in half.
“Finally I shot. A lot. More than I have in a long time, making a mess all over a small black end table. After, I was still awash in the glow, almost dizzy—no, giddy—with enjoyment… That was the best orgasm of my life. Maybe it was because… the experience was somehow non-sexual… somehow clean. It was purely hedonistic in a way, controlled by the hypnosis, but entirely unfettered.”
Curious, I dove in and did the best research a sex writer can do: firsthand experience.
Look, I’m always going to try new sex things in the name of science. With an open mind and no real agenda, I did the budget version and plugged myself into one of the free erotic hypnosis videos abounding on YouTube.
As open-minded as I was, I kept my expectations low. I mean, how much can you reasonably expect from a free YouTube video, especially one made for and by straight people when you yourself aren’t one?
As the hypnotist’s voice washed over me through my headphones, I’ll be honest – I almost laughed. His voice wasn’t particularly sexy. But as I kept listening, I found myself caring less and less. His voice became a distant thing, at once vital and forgettable to the experience. I can’t say exactly when the tone shifted, but an undeniable tension started building in me, transforming my whole body into a web of tingles. My hips bucked. And suddenly – right when he said to orgasm – I did, in a puddle of ripples and shudders that lasted far longer than most orgasms. Folks, I’ll corroborate: it happened exactly the way everyone else said it would: somehow intense and sexual, yet pure and clear-headed.
I may have gone in a skeptic, but I emerged a full-on believer.
To folks not in the know, erotic hypnosis may just seem like total mind control. Many people mistakenly think that the subject has no control over what happens and open themselves up to things they’d never consent to, from infidelity to violence.
The erotic hypnosis community, however, has something very different to say about the whole thing. For one thing, hypnotists cannot force their subjects to do anything they normally wouldn’t do. Hypnosis only draws out the things that the subjects were already inclined to do.
Likewise, a hypnosis session is much like any other kink: rules and norms abound. Like all BDSM scenes, boundaries are the name of the game, and nothing moves forward without absolute consent. The boundaries of the scene are safely and thoroughly negotiated beforehand, and there is a wellspring of community accountability to keep predators from using their positions to perpetuate violence.
Negotiating and clearly stating your boundaries and needs well before a scene starts frees you up to enjoy total surrender while the hypnotist does what they do best. While all partnered sexy time has its share of risks, the erotic hypnosis community by and large stresses a safe space for all. If you’re unsure about a situation or a hypnotist, there’s always the online hypnosis crew, who are more than happy to talk out anxieties.
If safety is a big concern for you, look for groups and forums on Reddit, where you can safely have all your questions about erotic hypnosis answered by real members of the community. You can also check out YouTuber The Secret Subject’s video on identifying abuse in an erotic hypnosis BDSM relationship. Be warned: some of it is potentially triggering. If you’re curious about the red flags, but want to skip any triggering discussion of consent violations, cut to 29:10 in the video, where you’ll watch her outline red flags and help her viewers cut off abuse before it starts.
And while the myth of male hypnotists and female subjects abounds, the reality is that nowadays the community is bursting with queer and women-led spaces, so that everyone can enjoy both sides of this sexy coin.
Skeptics may be less concerned with safety and more with hypnosis’ credibility. If that sounds like you, consider this: even if the orgasm is totally in a subject’s head, they’re still having hands-free orgasms – and who wouldn’t want to try that?
Like every kink out there, the internet is your friend if you’re looking to explore. Online, you’ll find many erotic hypnotists happy to work their magic on you irl or through Zoom. Curious first-timers may find themselves both safer and more satisfied when they hire professionals like Neil the Erotic Hypnotist, a New-York-based hypnotist who also does Skype sessions.
You can also always check out communities like NEEHU (the New England Erotic Hypnosis unConference), which features talks, classes, and play parties one mind-blowing weekend a year. The biggest site dedicated to building erotic hypnosis community both in-person and online is Warp My Mind. Check out the chat groups or lurk on the forums to learn more about this community.
Of course, there’s no more popular destination for kink than FetLife. With over seven million members around the globe as of 2019, there’s no shortage of folks who are into erotic hypnosis. Typing “erotic hypnosis” into the search will yield around 150 different groups for you to peek your head in. If you’ve never been on FetLife before, it may seem intimidating, but think of it as Facebook, but with more booty pics and a lot of BDSM. Signup is quick and free, and once you’re all set up, it’s simple to start connecting with folks both in your city and around the world for a good time.
But remember: your best judgment always prevails. Like with any dating or hookup site, it’s vital that your safety is top priority. While we may find ourselves chomping at the bit to finally indulge in a new kink, it’s important to realize that there is no lack of hypnotists out there. If someone feels sketchy, keep shopping. Using FetLife means you’ve got numbers on your side, and you don’t need to settle for someone you’re unsure about to satisfy a desire. Keep those standards high, and you’ll find someone who makes you feel both safe and sexy in no time.
My Advice? Turn to YouTube
You can always dive right in and start meeting people, but if you’re just curious about erotic hypnosis and don’t want to go whole hog just yet, major websites like Erotic Hypnosis feature downloads of various tracks from six professional hypnotists. But honestly? I think testing the waters calls for a little exploration free of charge – and there’s no better place to do that than YouTube.
Low stakes, impactful, and a thriving portal for erotic hypnosis, YouTube is the place to go when your curiosity reaches its peak. Each hypnotist on YouTube has their own unique approach and techniques, and you’ll have to play around to find who works for you, but some good places to start include…
- Tantra Goddess 888
- Master Jay
- CG Hypnosis
These three are among the most popular, but they’re by no means the only (or even necessarily the best) hypnotists on YouTube. Because it’s such a fascinating kink, more folks are hopping on board all the time.
They’re four of the more popular ones, keep your eyes peeled. More folks pour onto YouTube to create new erotic hypnosis videos all the time.
The perks of exploring erotic hypnosis through YouTube are hard to turn down. Not only is it totally free, it’s also safe. Because you can do this from the safety of your own home without interacting with anyone else or making commitments you’re uncomfortable with down the line, you can safely spend some alone time seeing what the lifestyle is like before agreeing to something or getting into a relationship that may not actually work for you.
Personally, when I tried my hand at erotic hypnosis, I felt nervous trying something new. But doing it through YouTube and knowing that I was in my own bedroom, totally safe, helped me relax and loosen up. If you’re like me and equal parts curious and anxious, there is no better low-stakes method of trying it out than YouTube.
As a subject or a hypnotist, all your fantasies are right around the corner. When you keep your own safety and priorities at the front of your mind, it’s easy to surrender completely to the fantasy and feel yourself become exactly who (or what) you’ve dreamt of in the bedroom.
And whether you’re a skeptic or sold, remember that the only thing keeping us from a total-body orgasm is our brain – so why not give the ole erotic hypnosis ride a spin? With just a few clicks of your mouse, you can sink into total pleasure right now.
Have you tried erotic hypnosis? Let us know what your experience was like in the comments below!
A PDX-based creator, Nikita applies a queer, sex-positive lens to everything she touches, from articles on foot fetishes to new song lyrics. When not delving into the juicy world of sex writing, she can be found working on her novel, making music, busying herself in community theater, or otherwise being a total ham.